A brief community musing.
Nov. 28th, 2022 04:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bladesparkI am overall a pretty liberal user of blocks and bans. I think that's a great way to be. Don't argue with the fash, just shut them out. Don't even argue with the "fandom antis" or whatever else. Shoo, go be weird prudes in your spaces, I'll be a weird horndog monsterfucker in mine!
It might say something, though, that I have blocked just two people here on DW?
I've talked in other places about running communities. I run several, all of them very small as these things go, but some of them venturing into difficult territory. And I've found that listed rules don't matter nearly as much as the way the community's moderators behave. Community culture shapes things in ways that written rules can't!
Sure, I can say "no bigotry here, treat people as real human beings" but saying that does nothing at all. Even banning people who cross a line only does a tiny bit. Consistently saying "Hey, so this conversation is getting uncomfortable, I don't want to forbid this, but maybe we could change the subject now?" when somebody goes on a rant where legit hurt feelings are involved but also harming other people is potentially happening... THAT does more than any number of listed rules. You're setting an expectation, you're controlling the "vibe" you're encouraging better behavior and not forbidding difficult feelings or uncomfortable topics, but just creating a structure where those things can be brought up, but if it goes too far, you're gonna haul it back just a bit.
I think shades of that are why Dreamwidth is so good. There's rules, and there's bans, and there's more structured moderation, sure, but there's also just...encouraging what you want to flourish.
So hey, thanks to the peeps who run this place. With twitter melting down, and with certain events in the Hades fandom I SEE how badly a lot of spaces are run, and I'm grateful that whatever happens, this space here is going to exist, to have some good vibes, and to attract and encourage people I don't have to block.
It might say something, though, that I have blocked just two people here on DW?
I've talked in other places about running communities. I run several, all of them very small as these things go, but some of them venturing into difficult territory. And I've found that listed rules don't matter nearly as much as the way the community's moderators behave. Community culture shapes things in ways that written rules can't!
Sure, I can say "no bigotry here, treat people as real human beings" but saying that does nothing at all. Even banning people who cross a line only does a tiny bit. Consistently saying "Hey, so this conversation is getting uncomfortable, I don't want to forbid this, but maybe we could change the subject now?" when somebody goes on a rant where legit hurt feelings are involved but also harming other people is potentially happening... THAT does more than any number of listed rules. You're setting an expectation, you're controlling the "vibe" you're encouraging better behavior and not forbidding difficult feelings or uncomfortable topics, but just creating a structure where those things can be brought up, but if it goes too far, you're gonna haul it back just a bit.
I think shades of that are why Dreamwidth is so good. There's rules, and there's bans, and there's more structured moderation, sure, but there's also just...encouraging what you want to flourish.
So hey, thanks to the peeps who run this place. With twitter melting down, and with certain events in the Hades fandom I SEE how badly a lot of spaces are run, and I'm grateful that whatever happens, this space here is going to exist, to have some good vibes, and to attract and encourage people I don't have to block.
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Date: 2022-11-29 01:01 am (UTC)I LOVE THIS OMFG 😂😂😂
Yeah, I like controlling the vibe. ["That's what he said." 😏🤣] One of the nice things about DW is that it's not a microblogging site and we can have actual conversations here instead of algorithm-driven clickbait.
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Date: 2022-11-29 01:07 am (UTC)I just had a tweet about fandom bullshit "escape containment" after being retweeted by somebody I don't know at all, and now I'm staring at my twitter notifications all "who are you weirdos?" and wondering what happens if this one has legs and keeps going.
And it's NEVER some cool thing I made, of course, it's either some really stupid bit of nonsense or some ranty expression of drama/pain/human awfulness that gets out and "goes viral."
Ugh. Can't one of my smut stories go viral? Or a plush I made, or a sex toy, or something fun and positive and not this shit? I'd even take one of the horror stories! At least that's a creative endeavor and not just shit.
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Date: 2022-11-29 01:10 am (UTC)[Yes, I get it that We Need To Talk About Important Things. But I can tick off a bunch of intersectional tickyboxes and it gets exhausting to be On Politically all the time, or have to make "As a trans man/as a disabled person/as a whatever, I feel..." statements every time Something Happens. Sometimes I just want to write/read gay smut.]
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Date: 2022-11-29 01:12 am (UTC)Also speaking "as a whatever" is so... ugh. Look, I have NO FUCKING IDEA what other trans dudes feel? I've talked to some, and it's a mix of "oh, bro I get you!" and "...what?!!! You do you, but what?!!!" I don't WANT to speak for anybody but my own individual self. And yeah, sometimes I want to be seen and heard and all that myself, but also...I write those things into the smut, just read that, it's more fun too!
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Date: 2022-11-29 01:16 am (UTC)Exactly!
And yes, I also write queer and trans themes in my smut. I honestly probably express myself better in my fic than I do in my actual Serious Commentary on shit.
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Date: 2022-11-29 01:23 am (UTC)I haven't yet harassed anybody into that, but I get the urge A LOT.
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Date: 2022-11-30 03:14 pm (UTC)So if we're going to go off about something, it's something we're willing to write a while post about, rather than a reaction gif in a quote tweet.